Let's Slow Things Down for a Bit..
So after a lackluster month of blog updating for July, I've recommitted myself to the cause. Someone told me I should do updates on the shows I perform at, kinda like a road journal of sorts.
Nah. Don't think so. Who wants to hear about penthouse suites, hot tubs, and champagne flutes? Who wants to know that the life of a comedian on the road is very similar to that of a rap video? Who wants to know that the status of a comedian in any town across America is the equivalent to Anthony Kiedis of Red Hot Chili Peppers strolling thru your villa?
I do. I wish. T'will never be
It's Holiday Inn. Remote bolted to the nightstand. 75 cent Dr. Peppers from a vending machine. The equivalent of Snow passing through your abode. Snow from "Informer" fame.
My parents celebrated their 35th wedding anniversary yesterday. Thirty five years is a long long time. I've been around for 28 and I'm sick of myself. If I had to guess how they made it work, I'd say it's because they're complete opposites
My mom's the talker: My dad listens
My mom's the laugher: My dad's the one that makes her laugh
My mom cooks: My dad eats
My mom's a woman: My dad isn't
But they're similar in the one area that they need to be. They're both stubborn when it comes to decisions. There's no flakiness or wishywashyness between them. They either like you or they don't.
One of the many things I adore them for is the fact that they've never felt the need to be the most popular people in the Indian community. That's what our community is known for. People wanting to feel like they're famous or everyone knows them or that they have the most friends. The perfect example is the size of weddings that Indians have. It's a yearly competition to see which couple can have the most people at their wedding or even anniversary. And to be fair, alot of times it's not the couple's decision to overload the church with six degrees of separation, it's the parents'. But my parents have never been that way. They never felt validated by the number of people around them. They knew that there was no way that that many people really gave a damn about you. They rested easy in the fact that they could have a handful of sincere, close friends and family around them. They know life is not about how many friends you have but who those friends are.
Life isn't high school. My parents aren't running for Homecoming King and Queen. My dad has no aspirations to be Senior Class President, and my mom isn't about to start making cupcakes and buttons to aid in his campaign.
My sister and I have subconsciously adopted that same mindstate. Both of us are in the public eye, so we have alot of acquaintances, but there's only a small group of people that we actually allow to be a part of our lives. To me, it's the way to go. I have friends who love the idea of being popular. Popular is not all it's cracked up to be. Popular's only fun when you have the unpopular to make fun of. At least that was the motto at my high school.
Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad Varghese.
Nah. Don't think so. Who wants to hear about penthouse suites, hot tubs, and champagne flutes? Who wants to know that the life of a comedian on the road is very similar to that of a rap video? Who wants to know that the status of a comedian in any town across America is the equivalent to Anthony Kiedis of Red Hot Chili Peppers strolling thru your villa?
I do. I wish. T'will never be
It's Holiday Inn. Remote bolted to the nightstand. 75 cent Dr. Peppers from a vending machine. The equivalent of Snow passing through your abode. Snow from "Informer" fame.
My parents celebrated their 35th wedding anniversary yesterday. Thirty five years is a long long time. I've been around for 28 and I'm sick of myself. If I had to guess how they made it work, I'd say it's because they're complete opposites
My mom's the talker: My dad listens
My mom's the laugher: My dad's the one that makes her laugh
My mom cooks: My dad eats
My mom's a woman: My dad isn't
But they're similar in the one area that they need to be. They're both stubborn when it comes to decisions. There's no flakiness or wishywashyness between them. They either like you or they don't.
One of the many things I adore them for is the fact that they've never felt the need to be the most popular people in the Indian community. That's what our community is known for. People wanting to feel like they're famous or everyone knows them or that they have the most friends. The perfect example is the size of weddings that Indians have. It's a yearly competition to see which couple can have the most people at their wedding or even anniversary. And to be fair, alot of times it's not the couple's decision to overload the church with six degrees of separation, it's the parents'. But my parents have never been that way. They never felt validated by the number of people around them. They knew that there was no way that that many people really gave a damn about you. They rested easy in the fact that they could have a handful of sincere, close friends and family around them. They know life is not about how many friends you have but who those friends are.
Life isn't high school. My parents aren't running for Homecoming King and Queen. My dad has no aspirations to be Senior Class President, and my mom isn't about to start making cupcakes and buttons to aid in his campaign.
My sister and I have subconsciously adopted that same mindstate. Both of us are in the public eye, so we have alot of acquaintances, but there's only a small group of people that we actually allow to be a part of our lives. To me, it's the way to go. I have friends who love the idea of being popular. Popular is not all it's cracked up to be. Popular's only fun when you have the unpopular to make fun of. At least that was the motto at my high school.
Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad Varghese.
posted by Paul at 10:50 AM
8 Comments:
Paul, what a wonderful column. I'm glad your parents are so wonderful that you can adore them, and that you and your sister have the same values.
- Doug W
aww that was sweet. We left some carrot cake for you in the fridge.
I scarfed it down this morning for breakfast..that's why this blog entry was so sugary. blecch
time to type up some sarcasm to counteract it
Good insight about the Malayalee popularity contest. Reminds me of my Mom always telling me that we need to invite so and so to whatever event, or they won't invite you to theirs. And then she went that extra mile to mention that I don't want a funeral with no one attending. So, if I don't invite Pappachen to my kid's baptism, he won't come to my funeral? So odd.
Mark, I've been emotionally flipped inside out. What I once wore on the inside for no one to see has now bubbled up to the front. Don't worry. I'm in the process of re-jading myself back into society.
Well, since I'm a girl, I have to say I like the sappy side of Paul. Chicks dig that sensitive BS. :)
There are a couple things to be momentarily sensitive about. Your favorite sports team and the to go box (your girlfriends leftovers)you forgot to take from the restaurant. I will give Paul a pass on this brief display of emotion because it is so rare from him. If I ever wrote a poem and I wasn't still in 7th grade, and the girl didn't laugh in my face, I would have to dump her.
Jenn: you lie. Once upon a time I thought that I would be impressed by "Sappy..sensitive BS"-- then I turned 12. -Lina
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